OurLadyJ

lustre

allison and i, last night

lustre

so much fun.

go see it! abrons arts center june 25-28

passing strange

oh my god.

you HAVE to go see this musical!

passing strange is one of the best things i’ve ever seen on stage.

the music, writing, performances, direction, set -EVERYTHING- was soooo amazing.

go! go! go!

jesus was a tranny

Jesus saw some babies nursing.

He said to his disciples, “These nursing babies are like those who enter the kingdom.”

They said to him, “Then shall we enter the kingdom as babies?”

Jesus said to them, “When you make the two into one,

and when you make the inner like the outer and the outer like the inner,

and the upper like the lower,

and when you make male and female into a single one,

so that the male will not be male nor the female be female,

when you make eyes in place of an eye,

a hand in place of a hand,

a foot in place of a foot,

an image in place of an image,

then you will enter [the kingdom].”
His disciples said to [Jesus],

“When will the rest for the dead take place, and when will the new world come?”

He said to them, “What you are looking forward to has come, but you don’t know it.”

it’s too durn hot

relaxing in my air conditioning after a night out

glamour glamour

kiss kiss

thinking about my week

…

earlier

i was asked to have a baby for a friend,

and i seriously considered it

until i realized that i would have to go through menapause

and then puberty all over again

in order to produce the baby batter.

but the risks of the child having complications are too great

to put my body through that,

so i’m putting the idea on hold. for now.

…

i’m rarely unsure about how i feel towards something,

but i am unsure how i feel about being infertile.

i suppose there’s a sadness that isn’t ready to surface.

…

i’ve been hesitant to proclaim that i am a woman trapped in a man’s body.

or that i should have been born a woman.

that i should be able to birth a child.

i’ve been hesitant to rebuke nature,

because i don’t want to feel like i am a mistake.

…

yes, there is a sadness

but it’s buried under not wanting to feel like a victim of nature.

…

perhaps i’ll adopt

…

goodnight

summer dresses

so, i swore that i’d never wear a dress

thinking i’d look like a man in a dress

(an obvious insecurity of mine

resulting in an unfortunate judgment of others).

but as i’ve crossed the gender boundaries

i’ve become more and more comfortable

with accepting people in whatever the hell they feel like wearing
resulting in me wearing whatever the hell i feel like wearing

and in this weather, thank god.

i now LOVE dresses!

one glamourous group

the cast of Mayqueen

as presented by Queer Up North

May 23rd, 2008

Manchester, UK

(L-R)

Taylor Mac, Nathan Carrera, Our Lady J, Bitch, Johnny Woo

Justin Bond, David Hoyle

psalm

last night, while performing with the gay men’s chorus

i tilted back my head

during the debut of my newest composition ‘psalm’

and i disappeared

along with the original lyrics of the song.

but out came even more beautiful lyrics

lyrics i had never heard nor rehearsed before,

and i was reminded how exhilarating it feels

to channel.

whatever it was, it was powerful

and it left me blessed.

where it all began

I was 4 years old when I first put on lipstick. It was my brother’s idea. Well, the makeup was my idea, but the game was his. He wanted to play GI Joe (as usual) and thought we should dress up for the parts- he was always Cobra, and I, Mr. Joe. So we went for our mother’s makeup bag and found what seemed to be appropriate colors. He took the blue eye shadows and I took the brown blushes and maroon lipstick. It was a sample tube, probably from the Avon lady… we were poor and she was thrifty.

By the time we were done putting on our costumes, our faces were completely made over with the sloppy war paint, except for my perfectly painted maroon lips. We giggled at how much fun we were having until our dad came into the bathroom with the most horrified look on his face.

If I were to let my eyebrows grow out, my brow line would look exactly like my father’s- hugely pronounced and completely terrifying when provoked. It was his secret weapon for scaring small children to tears and driving us to do what he wanted us to do. “Your mother is going to be so mad!” He deflected his own horror, written on the brow. I believe he was genuinely worried that we had ruined her good makeup, but only moments later he was lecturing about the woe’s of boys wearing makeup. He went on and on, scrubbing the war paint away with a wet washcloth and no makeup remover (now, really).

Obviously, it was all downhill from there.